|
The Magic of
Change
By Claudette Rowley
Copyright 2004
"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and
seemingly
secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real
security in
what is no longer meaningful. There is more security
in the
adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and
in
change there is power."
- Alan
Cohen
Often when I ask new clients how they handle change, I
hear
responses such as "I hate change!" or "I'm terrible at
change."
It's very rare that someone says to me "I love
change. When
change appears in my life, I just go with the flow."
Change is a part of life. In fact, some would say
that
maintaining balance in the midst of change IS
life. Change is
always happening. We only need to look at the
natural world to
know this. Human life, like nature, ebbs and flows,
lives and
dies, can erupt like a volcano and be as peaceful as the
stream
burbling through your backyard. Yet so often we
resist that
which is natural.
The "magic" in change is being present with
it. Being present
with it means allowing it to be what it is. It's so
easy to
resist change because it stimulates fear, it's unknown and
we
feel out of control. However, you have the choice to
allow
change rather than resisting it. Here's a sentence
that often
helps me: "It is what it is, so it couldn't be
different."
Keys to allowing:
* Keep in mind that you don't have to like it; you just have
to
allow it. Caveat: Often when
we're told to ACCEPT a situation,
we think that means we have to like
it. You don't have to
like it, you simply need to allow without judgment
- your
thoughts, feelings, and actions.
* Observe your thoughts and emotions
objectively. Observing
your thoughts and emotions heightens your awareness
of
them. Rather than simply being "in"
them, you can also be
conscious of them.
* Notice what you are resisting. You are in
resistance when you
are thinking something "should be different than it
is." I
want to make a distinction here. Often
at work or in our
personal lives, we see situations that definitely
need to be
addressed or improved. Here's the subtle
difference where
change is involved: When you notice
something that you think
should be different, first allow it. It
is what it is. From a
place of acceptance, you can choose whether to take
action,
say what needs to be said or do nothing.
* Refrain from judgment - judgment of yourself, others or
situations. The moment you judge
yourself, another person or a
situation, you are in resistance and not
present. The trick
here is to keep noticing and observing any
judgment. We are
socially conditioned to judge, so most of do it
unconsciously
much of the
time. Caveat: It's easy to start judging
yourself
for judging. That's your mind looking
for a way to take you
out of presence. It's a common
occurrence, so be attentive to
it.
One of the easiest ways to live is from consciousness -
being
present in each moment and aware of your thoughts, feeling
and
actions. Change is part of the flow of
life. Resisting it won't
stop it; nothing will. You're as likely to prevent
change as
you are to stop ocean tides. Allow for change, allow
it to be
what it is. That's the magic.
------------------------------------------------------------------
Claudette Rowley, coach and author, helps professionals
identify and pursue their true purpose and calling in
life.
Contact her today for a complimentary consultation at
781-676-5633
| 
